Today has been a very hard day for Jonah behaviorally and I don’t feel like talking much about it.
The fact that it’s the 8th anniversary of my best friend Gina’s suicide doesn’t help. She’s been gone almost as long as I knew her. Of course I can’t wrap my mind around her being “gone” at all, let alone for that length of time.
Time mystifies me.
In spite of my drama, it is absolutely deliciously crisp & autumn-gorgeous outside. And I have a list of good things that have happened today:
Jonah got to see two trains.
We went to grandma’s house, where Jonah pooped on the potty and got some black soda.
Jonah asked for red barn (a favorite landmark he enjoys passing by on car rides) and he got red barn.
My mom bought me a delicious turkey sandwich.
Jonah and I are listening to Guster’s brand new CD, Easy Wonderful, as much as possible, over and over.
Sometimes when he whines and yells incessantly from the backseat, I drown him out:
I was down for the count
Without any real way out
In this new submarine
Like the whale of Jonah’s dreams
What if I should rise up
From several fathoms deep
A scar on my soul
And a humbling tale of the world
That swallowed me whole…
~Guster
The Never Normal 